Avengers- Mind Over Body Part 1

This wasn't how Jane typically woke up in the morning.

How she woke up depended on what she'd been doing the night before. If she'd spent it alone with her work, she awoke to an air conditioner blowing in her face and scratchy, yet warm cotton sheets pulled up to her neck, with her favorite fluffy pillow under her head. If she'd been on a date, she got up whenever Loki wanted her to (because no matter how hard she tried, Jane could never wake up before him), either from his hands crawling up her shirt or a light trail of kisses at the corners of her mouth.

What happened next, Jane was not at liberty to discuss. Suffice to say, this was not how she found herself waking up today, and that was very odd. She could've sworn she spent the night with Loki last night.

She was fooled, for a moment, into thinking everything was fine and that she'd finally achieved her dream of being the first one up. But that couldn't be right. The sun was far too high in the sky. It had to be at least noon, if not later. It wasn't that uncommon for her to sleep so late, not with Loki keeping her busy well into the morning hours.

What was weird was for the hotel room walls to suddenly change color during the night.

In fact… had there always been a jacuzzi in the bathroom?

That was hardly the only difference. The weight on the other side of the bed, while distinctly masculine, didn't feel right- or sound right.

Since when did Loki snore?

Jane was frozen, the silken covers over her head. A few strands of hair fell in her face. Hair that was the wrong color.

She had to just be seeing things, right?

Her bedfellow shifted in his sleep, a sound like a cat hacking up a chainsaw preceding a pair of arms snaking around her waist. Since when had Loki's arms been so hairy?

He nuzzled his face into her shoulder. His facial hair covered face.

That was about all Jane could take. She wrenched herself free, jolting him awake in the process. He mumbled something she couldn't comprehend as Jane twisted herself around to greet the sight of Tony Stark, rubbing sleep from his eyes and smirking at her.

"Morning, babe. Up for a quickie?"

Jane screamed. The voice that came out of her mouth wasn't her own.

Tony screamed, sounding exactly like he was supposed to.

The front door burst off its hinges. Jane found herself staring at her own face, mirroring her- for lack of a better word- in abject shock and awe.

**
This was Loki's favorite method of waking up.

He never rose at the same moment twice, but when he did, Jane was always undisturbed at his side, lovely in a way she rarely was during waking hours.

Not that she wasn't always beautiful. There was just something about her in this serene state of peace; no mortal concerns to weigh her down, no SHIELD puppets trying to keep her under thumb. For a little while, nothing mattered but the sweet dreams he knew her to be having. He just hoped most of them featured him.

There was also, of course, the fact that he got to wake her up.

Loki's nimble fingers trailed up the smooth curve of her hipbone. She was a little thing, his Jane, with skin soft as silk, and oh so sensitive. His hand moved beneath the confines of her loose nightshirt, tracing her breasts to her nipples. They puckered under his ministrations. She hummed in her sleep, and Loki grinned.

"Rise and shine," he whispered in her ear and then kissed the shell of it. He made his way across her cheek to her mouth. Plump pink lips were slightly parted in a most inviting way. Loki ran his tongue over his first to wet them, then he placed a firm, yet gentle kiss right over the top of her lips.

Jane's eyes opened.

And Loki knew.

One couldn't say how he knew, except for that Loki was a mage.

He knew magic, knew the signs of it, the shapes it could take. He knew it all by heart.

More than that, he knew Jane, and more even than that, he knew Thor.

He screamed.

Thor screamed too, Jane's voice ripping out Jane's mouth. Jane's body flew from the bed, but it was not Jane who propelled it. It was not Jane doing any of it.

Minutes later, they were on the stairs, skipping two at a time to get to the very top floor where Thor slept. In Jane's body, Thor was struggling to keep up, and it was a tragedy that Loki couldn't savor Thor's newfound weakness.

"Brother, I-"

"Don't call me that!" Loki snapped.

Thor furrowed his- Jane's- brow. "I thought we were past that now."

"We are," Loki said without thinking. "I mean… I don't want to hear that in Jane's voice."

They approached the second highest floor- the one Stark was inhabiting with his lover. Screams resonated as far the stairs, giving both brothers pause. They shared a glance, it was difficult for Loki to see Thor's serious expression on Jane's pretty face.

Loki sighed. "I hope that's not what it sounds like."

Reluctantly, Loki rushed after Thor to Stark's room. As Thor lacked the strength to push the door down, it was up to Loki to be an unsubtle brute for him. The door crumpled, and they were treated to the sight of Pepper Potts screaming bloody murder as she crawled as far from Stark as she could. Looking at them now, her face was pale as a sheet.

"THAT'S ME!" she shrieked, pointing at Thor.

"Jane? Is that you?" he cried, pointing at Jane.

"Oh, Valhalla above," Loki moaned with a hand on his head.

"Will someone please tell me what the hell is going on here?!" screamed Stark.

**
If there were ever an upside to all this, it was that Jane at least did not have to contend with his brother's oafish body. Beyond the complications of a human wielding the power of Mjolnir, there was the obvious complication of having his lover in the body of his brother. Ten minutes in and he was ready to sell Thor's soul to the Norns if it meant getting it out of Jane's body and never having to wake up to that again.

In the time since him and Thor had calmed down and gone to look for Jane, they had made a silent agreement never to speak of what happened again.

With her in Pepper Potts's body… well, it wasn't ideal, but at least Ms. Potts was more pleasing to the eye. Happy as he was with Jane, he had certainly let his gaze linger at the beach the day before, when Ms. Potts had shown up in a well chosen ruby red one piece.

Really though, he'd take anything over Thor.

With that headache relieved, Loki paced around the room and those assembled. Stark, still in his nightclothes, kept at least a foot away from the woman wearing Ms. Potts's face. Jane looked even less happy to be there than he did, not that Loki could blame her. It was tasking to remember that it was Ms. Potts he had to look to, and not the body right beside her, that was rightfully hers. Thor was the only one to meet his eye, wearing a look that was and wasn't Jane at her most serious.

"Alright," Loki said, looking at no one in particular, though it was clear to everyone who he was addressing. "May I hear the story again?"

Stark rolled his eyes, then glanced Jane's way, expecting her to scold him the way Ms. Potts would.

"We were at the party," he said. "I was getting bored, so I tried to get Jane and Bruce together for a little excavation. Bruce was off somewhere with Betty and I couldn't find him, so it was just me and Jane."

Loki nodded. "Go on."

"I took Pepper along, because there was no way I was leaving her. Then Thor spotted us and asked to join in. So we walked around the beach for a while, heading in the direction of the forest. I found this cave to explore, and a little ways in, Jane found some kind of writing on the walls."

"It was an ancient language from the looks of it," Jane butt in excitedly. "I didn't know for sure- my only experience with dead languages was a college roommate who was studying linguistics, but she had this book she lent me-"

"Anyway," Stark snapped. Loki would've gotten him for that, but it wasn't like he didn't agree. "Jane wanted to go in deeper, and so we wound up finding this series of caverns, and through the one we chose, we found this weird underground temple, like Indiana Jones. Jane wanted to check it out, but being a gentlemen, I insisted on going first. I found a bunch of ancient artifacts all laid out like a display. I didn't want to touch anything, but I think my hand may have brushed this one piece of pottery by accident."

"The next thing we know, there's this huge burst of light," Jane continued. "It was awful, it felt like my skin was burning off."

"I believe our friend Tony didn't feel it because he was standing behind the blast," said Thor, grave in a way that made Loki's insides twist. "For myself and the ladies, however…"

He gave no further explanation. He doesn't need to. The story finished once more, Loki could feel a powerful tension forming at his temples.

"So, the four of you gallivanted off to parts unknown, you meddled with ancient magics which I highly doubt are of this world, and look at the results." He made a wide, sweeping motion at his temporally displaced brother and lover, both of whom dropped their heads in shame. "The question now becomes this: if Jane is in Ms. Potts's body, and Thor is in Jane's, where is…?"

A heavy thud over the ceiling preceded a deep scream of horror. Gray storm clouds formed out the window, bringing forth strong winds that shook the very foundation of the building.

**
"I'm so, so sorry, Tony. I'm sorry."

Pepper Potts heaved heavy sobs into the armrest of her chair. The steel frame had been bent completely out of shape from her pressing down on it. As if Loki needed a reminder of what a problem Thor's power in the hands of a mortal would be. While he tended to the mangled structure of Tony's left arm, he considered his next move.

Ms. Potts had been distraught when they found her. The room was half flooded, with indoor rain clouds creating a downpour all around her. She had curled herself into a tight ball, quite a feat, what with how large and bulky Thor's body was. Once she calmed down and Thor had walked her through banishing the storm, Loki saw to removing the water. Upon spotting Stark among them, Ms. Potts forgot herself and ran to him. In her haste and lack of control, she'd pulled Stark's arm right out of it's socket. That she didn't rip it right off was evidence that someone was watching over Tony Stark. Getting his arm back into place was quick work (Stark didn't even scream). The most Loki could do now was provide a salve to lessen the pain, while Thor saw to the weeping Ms. Potts who had taken his body, and Jane just sat on the couch playing with her hair, like she expected any second now to wake up in bed and have this all have been a dream.

"If only," Loki muttered.

"You say something, Rock of Ages?"

Loki blinked at the obnoxious man he was, against his better judgement, treating.

"What does that even mean?"

"Nevermind that!" Ms. Potts cried. A small roll of thunder clapped ominously in the distance. "Just tell us how to fix this, please."

Loki checked Stark's arm one more time before clearing his throat. With bated breath, they waited to hear what he had to say. In the meantime, a combination of Tony's presence and Thor's/Jane's hand on hers/his kept Ms. Potts from setting off a hurricane.

"Well, the good news is that fixing your condition will be quite simple for me," Loki said.

A collective wave of relief rolled over them, none more so than Ms. Potts and Stark.

"Thank god," said Stark. "I swear, I do not think I could handle my girlfriend being a big alien viking, much less a man. No offense, Point Break."

He waved awkwardly in Thor's direction. The fool was getting to know Jane's long hair a little better as he struggled to keep it out of his face. At one point, he started messing with some items laid out on the nightstand. He found nothing bind it back and had to put in extra effort to move aside a heavy lamp fixture to aid he search. He spent a long time staring downtrodden at his- at Jane's hands afterwards. Idiot.

"The bad news," Loki paused to let that sink in, "is that I'll need at least 24 hours to prepare, so the three of you will have to live as each other until I am ready."

He smiled at the end, and they took it about as well as could be expected.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" shouted Ms. Potts, punctuated by a bolt of lightning. "I can't be stuck as Thor, I have a meeting with the directors of Stark Industries' New England branch in three hours!"

"And I have to present my latest research to SHIELD," said Jane.

"I have been asked by Nick Fury to assist in the training of some new recruits this afternoon," said Thor demurely. He sounded almost exactly like Jane in a sad mood when he did that. Loki hoped he never would again.

"You're just going to have to go as each other," Loki said, and he glared at them when they looked like they were going to object again. "Thor, you will have to bring Jane's research to SHIELD in her place. Ms. Potts must control her emotions long enough to train the recruits, and Jane, you will go to the board meeting as Ms. Potts."

Ms. Potts moaned and slumped over. No thunder or lightning followed, thank Odin for that. No one else looked any more enthusiastic, but Thor, at least, put on a brave face.

"If that is what must be done, then we shall do it," he said in a truly leaderly way. He brought his fist to his chest. "Jane Foster, I swear on my honor as a son of Odin to do you justice before your superiors. And Lady Pepper, I will assist you however necessary in getting through this."

"That sounds great," said Ms. Potts without looking at Thor or even opening her eyes. "Just great…"

"Yeah, real great," grumbled Stark as he leaned over to grab his glass of vodka. "But does it really have to be a day? I bet you could do it faster if you tried."

Loki's eye flicked to his.

"You wish for me to speed up the delicate process of preparing for and executing a spell that could rip the skin from their bones if just one little thing is done wrong?" he asked, met with looks of horror from all four of them. "I wonder how alive you would be right now if you rushed in making your suits."

Stark swallowed another swig of his drink and smacked his lips.

"You paint a detailed picture. He tossed the empty glass aside carelessly and nodded at Thor. "What about you, Point Break? You're in his girlfriend's body. Go seduce him with it. Make him work faster."

"NO!" the brothers shouted together, successfully making Stark jump for once.

"Woah, calm down," he said. "I was kidding."

They stared him down for a while longer. Even in Jane's body, Thor knew intimidation well. Stark would probably never admit how much they were scaring him, but they'd always know. They could smell fear.

"Okay, knock it off, guys," Jane piped in. She had her hand on her throat to feel the vibrations of a voice she wasn't used to, but even with that hindering her, she held herself well, the way Loki knew she would. "If we have to wait, we have to wait. It's only for one day." She looked to Ms. Potts and Thor. "For now… we'll just have to learn to be each other as best we can."

A thickening fog of anxiety was forming over, one Loki could acutely feel.

This was going to be a long day indeed.